Listen to The Coach!

Man Hunt Hot Mess

I've recently become obsessed with a site called Man Hunt.  Have you heard of it or been there?  Lots of hotness and lots of hot mess.  I can't resist sharing some of the latter with you because I think it's absolutely hilarious.

So, here's a Man Hunt Hot Mess for you.

First, let's give the poor guy some credit and point out the good things about him.  He's somewhat attractive.  His face is okay, but he does have a smoking hot bod, but based on his pose he already knows that.  Nice guns too!  Now for the bad...

I hate the "smell my pit" pose!

And pal, could we have maybe cleaned the toothpaste spittle off the mirror first before taking erotic pics of ourselves?  Just a thought.

I probably would have also cropped the bottom of the pic so that viewers don't see that nasty yellow sponge laying on your vanity there.

I'm not going to mention the dirty towel hanging in the back ground.  Oh, too late.  I just did.  But I'm saving the best for last...

You guessed it!  Nice balancing act with your camera on top of the 1960s Glade air freshener that has obviously expired.  Do they even make those things anymore?

Poor guy.  He's hotness.  But his pic is a hot mess!

Lunch Time Fun

Hooked up with a guy yesterday on lunch. We met at his vacant apartment.  He'd just moved, so the place was empty, but he still had the keys for a few days.  He had a very handsome and rugged face.  Nice clipped hair, kind of a crew cut almost; and a nicely trimmed goatee and mustache.  He had a few extra pounds, but his chest had a bit of definition and was nice and hairy.  I wish I could say the sex was as hot as it appears to be in this picture. 

We wasted no time undressing.  I complemented him on his hairy cock.  It was very thick and he had on a silver cock ring. I immediately dropped to my knees to service him.  He had that musky scent men get when they don't trim down there and probably move around a lot during the day.  I tried to block it out and enjoy the size of his cock in my mouth. It was above average and definitely thick the harder he got.

After about a five minute blow job I stood up thinking he might like to kiss or service me.  Nope.  "Wanna get fucked?" he says.  "Sure, how do you want me?"  "Hands and knees?"  "Okay."

Right there in his empty living room, I got down on my hands and knees and worried about rug burn for only about 3 seconds.  He sniffed on poppers while lubing himself up and applying a bit to my ass.  His large cock slid in with ease, surprising to me since I have not been fucked in about two weeks, and because he was so big.  It took no time for my muscles to relax and accept him.  I don't usually like it doggy style, but found this time to be quite pleasurable.  He liked it slow, sliding in and out of me, and finally offered me his poppers.  I accepted them, but in no time he was ready to come.  We'd barely gotten started.

He stood up to wipe himself off with one of the towels I'd brought since the place was empty.  I rolled over on my back and jacked off.  He didn't even look down at me when I came.  He offered me the other towel and was already putting his clothes on before I was on my feet.  Such a handsome face to be such a lousy lay.  Oh well, sex is like pizza.  Even when it's bad, it's still a little good. But no kissing.  I didn't even get a blow job. The fucking was nice, just wish it'd lasted longer. 

We said good-bye.  I looked at the clock and still had 30 minutes on lunch.  I went to McDonalds.  He was actually right behind me in the drive through.  Kind of made me laugh.  No cigarette after sex.  No beer. No kiss. Just a Big Mac combo and a Diet Coke.  Then back to work. 

Lunch was over.

He said we could do it again on Wednesday.  He has the keys till then.  Somehow, I don't think he'll call. And if he does, can't say I'll answer.

Makin' Love

I made love last Saturday at 10am in the morning. It's the first time I've had sex in the AM since I don't know when. I call it love, because although sex was involved, it was the kind of sex that's slow and enjoyable rather than just being a quickie. It was not with someone I actually love. I know very little about this person.

It started with a long session of kissing at the door, then we moved to the bedroom and kissed some more. We undressed slowly, our bodies pressed against each other. We ignored the rock hard bulges pressing between us and concentrated instead on each other's lips, necks, and ears. We looked into each other's eyes, savoring the moment.  It felt good.

I slid down his body and took his cock into my mouth, then we traded so he could suck me.  He was a much better cock sucker than I am. Sure, I made him moan and whisper, but he could have been faking it.  But he made me want to hold my breath and scrunch my eyes shut.  He kissed the inside of my thighs and engulfed my entire cock deep into his mouth.  God, I yearn for that again.

He wanted to fuck me, but instead asked if he could tease me with his cock.  I wanted him to fuck me, and knew that he would but I didn't want to just say it.  With my legs in the air, he teased my hold with the head of his cock.  Soon, I turned over onto my stomach so he could slide his cock along my crack.  He lubed it up for ease.  And eventually, without asking, he slid into me.  I let him.  Like I said, I had wanted him to all along.  He fucked me with nice long and slow strokes while whispering in my ear.  It was wonderful.  It was the way love making should be.  Sure, I like it fast and quick sometimes, but I usually end up with that more often than I do the slow enjoyable sessions. 

I dressed and left and it was just 11am.  A whole hour of sex!  That never happens.  I'm lucky usually to get 15 minutes. And I left completely and totally satisfied, looking upon the sunny day with anticipation of what else my Saturday could possibly bring.

That's how you make love.